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Chad Ochocinco has an eccentric personality, and everyone knows it. He’s clearly athletic, and has everything a girl could ever want. That’s why VH1 thought it would be good to give Eight Five his own dating show. But have you seen the contestants? When did Spearmint Rhino let all its employees go on leave? These women would make Susan Boyle proud of her looks. One of my friends says VH1 does less for black people than Jim Crowe. And he is right. Again. The saying goes that there are many fish in the sea. Ocho must know this because I can’t imagine he’d ever give a ring to one of the contestants. So it’s time to play matchmaker. Welcome to the best free agent market in the world. Hell, with these 25 beauties, it’s the best market in the world. Except Costco.

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